A little humor always helps when the world gets too real!


Cj at A Soldiers Perspective always has some of the best commentaries on the Iraqi war and other topics I have read. He also covers other events, like the recent Hurricanes and other pressing or interesting news stories. He has a sharp wit and an even sharper intellect.

His posts about him and his family from time to time are really great. One of the ones I always enjoy is his “Chris-isms.” These are little updates on the trials and tribulations of his son’s life as seen through the eyes of a loving father. In going through his blog today my eye caught the word, “Chris-ism” and it reminded me of something that happened about ten years ago though it wasn’t very funny to me at the time. But later, I was able to put the sequence of events into perspective and get quite a chuckle.

My son’s friend had a BB gun. Robert knew he wasn’t allowed to be with his friend when he had his BB gun out because his friend wasn’t supervised. But boys will be boys. Despite that fact they got the gun out and shot at targets whenever they thought I wouldn’t catch them.

But he never got rid of all the incriminating evidence. I always found one or two BB’s in his pockets when I did the laundry. On one particular occasion I found a BB in his pocket. I confronted him. He ‘fessed up and took his punishment. Then I put the BB in a dish on the table near my couch. Later that evening we were all watching a movie on TV. I fell asleep watching the movie because I was tired from cutting the grass earlier.

Remember those dumb machines that you put coins in and then watched the money roll round and round until it drops in? Have you ever given thought to how much your outer ear looks like one of those things? Well, my son did!

As I slept, I felt something cold hit my right ear ever so gently, then, whop, I couldn’t hear anymore. That’s because I am deaf in my left ear. I jumped up right and all I could hear was silence. Both my son and daughter had shocked looks on their faces. I told them I couldn’t hear. Something just happened to my good ear! I must have been talking rather loud by the looks on their faces. Then I noticed a look of concern on my daughter’s face. On my son’s face was a look of concern and “fear!”

As I tried to clear my ear by holding my nose and then swallowing I got moments of hearing where I was able to determine my son had dropped that BB in my ear to see if it would roll like coins do in those coin thingies! It never occurred to him the BB wouldn’t just roll out when I tilted my head. I was furious. The the more I tried to clear my ear the more it became lodged. I was also concerned about damage to my ear drum. It was a horrible sensation feeling this thing moving around in my ear. It was rather frightening thinking I might not hear again, too!

I gathered the kids and we went to the emergency room to see if they could help since it was a weekend. When I told them why I was there the lady just looked at me hard and tried not to laugh. I think she could tell I was not in a humorous mood, especially when she realized I couldn’t hear at all. When she took the chart back to the nursing staff, one of the nurses finally came out and led me away to do my “vitals.” I could tell she had been having quite a laugh at my expense. But at least she had the courtesy to not laugh in front of me.

Finally, I saw a doctor. He too found the whole thing amusing. He tried to tell me what he was going to do but I really couldn’t hear him. So I just shook my head yes. At this point as I tried to talk, the BB made me feel some mild pain or discomfort. When I could hear it was like being in a barrel.

The doctor irrigated my ear and finally got the stupid thing out. But it was not a particularly easy task. It had gotten lodged quite deeply in the canal. Fortunately, my ear drum wasn’t affected. Once it was out, I was so relieved to hear again. Then the doctor gave my son a kind lecture about never putting anything in his or someone else’s ears. I can still hear the emergency room staff laughing as I left to go home. All the way home my son was quiet as a Church mouse. My daughter had a look on her face that said you’re going to get it when we get home.

When we got home, I surprised them both by not punishing him. I reminded him again something I had often done before, to N-E-V-E-R put anything in his ears or anyone else’s ears. Then we all had a good laugh and the kids had a good story to tell their friends!

p.s. My son never did put anything in my ears or his own again!

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~ by devildog6771 on October 16, 2005.

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